THE COSMIC EGG

and my story of how I cracked open in 2024

As a mystic, I have long been attracted to the concept and mythological stories of the cosmic egg.

Hmmmmm - COSMIC EGG - Doesn’t the name itself hold an appeal of mystery to you?!

Early in 2024, aware of a deep call from divine wisdom sounding in me, as a 75-year-old, I set the intention to become more cosmically aligned. In truth, I had little idea what that meant, but I invited an initiatory journey into this stage of elderhood. Beware what you ask for! In many ways, my life cracked wide open from the outside in and the inside-out.

Curiously a few weeks later, consciously moving in this mystical drive for alignment in this last season of my life, I chose to sleep out alone under the awesome night sky on a picnic table in Joshua Tree National Park. My daughter tucked me into my sleeping bag and left for her comfy, converted school bus. As coyotes howled, the vastness of the night was overwhelming. I sense a kind of death-entry transpired. Ha! This snapshot Rachel took as she said goodnight displays it - the night swallowing me up, levitating in smoke on what now appears mythically as a morgue slab.

Vertigo claimed me that night. I could barely walk the next morning. My body suddenly experienced the symptoms of an off-balanced-ness that I had been aware of intellectually, but never physically. Fuzzy, disoriented, slowed-down embodiment is not playful fun. It precipitated weeks of medical tests, hours of internal check-ins, and exposed an underlying layer of acute anxiety. It seemed this off-balancing nature of fear wanted to be seen and was ready for healing, and re-alignment. The necessary gift arriving mysteriously to enable my embodied being to fly most freely into eventual cosmic consciousness - into death whenever she arrives.

And very significantly, I became aware too that this was not only my story of fear, but in some acute way I was experiencing the compacted traumatized fear from years of my matrilineal lineage. This became and has continued as a profound journey into ancestral healing as I opened my awarenss to my 128 grandmothers from 7 generations.

There’s much more to say about this. For those who are paid subscribers and supporting this soulful evolution of my emerging new book, you will receive a full chapter version of this story tomorrow.

The core of this post today is to express that we are all as humans, part of a cosmic egg.

Alignment as an Individual – a living community of bones/ blood/ nerves / organs/ ancestral and personal trauma/spirit/ encased in skin … and aura of energetic body-being with a multitude of internal processes moving as community.

Attunement in Community – inter-connected, loved, held, seen, mirrored, valued as an individual within human family and the more-than-human natural world.

I love how Richard Rohr in the meditations from Center for Action and Contemplation last week describes the way we must grow in expansive alignment from ‘my story’ to ‘our story’ to ‘another story’ - all part of the story of this cosmos. If you have not read it, I highly recommend following the details of this series of meditations.

Here’s his overview and imagery:

‘My story’ is the little stage where I do my dance and where the questions are usually, “How do I feel? What do I believe? What makes me unique?”

The second dome of meaning is ‘our story’. This is the dome of our group, our community, our country, our church—perhaps our nationality or ethnic group. We seem to need this to contain our identity and security as social beings ... loyalties at this level have driven most of human history up to now.

The term ‘other story’ illustrates the significant but sometimes painful recognition that our story is not the only frame, not likely the most important frame, and maybe even a frame with a lot of shadow and bias.

The fourth dome of meaning, which encloses and regulates the three smaller ones, is called the story… the patterns that are always true. This is much larger and more shared than any one religion or denomination… For example, forgiveness always heals; it does not matter whether we are Hindu, Buddhist, Christian, or Jewish … (or atheist – my addition). Forgiveness is one of the patterns that is always true, although it reveals its wisdom in countless ways. It is part of the story.

Friends, here’s my invitation of the week for you:

How clearly (or unclearly) do you understand how your ‘my story of belonging’ exquisitely fits into the larger universal story of the cosmos? (There is absolutely nothing wrong about not-knowing, but please do consider what protects you / shields you from being curious and creating some meaningful foray into this unknown? There is a world of portals waiting for you to step in.)

And a question especially for olders like me - what does it feel like to know that you soon will be called to enter this cosmic world in death? How might you be invited into radical, closer alignment and attunement to your eldersoul call from and for this planet?

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Thanks for reading. I’d love to get your comments!

And - I’ll be back next post with more soulful experiential musings about what it means to be part of ‘our story’.